You know those annoying shirts that are like, actors do it on stage, dentists do it in your mouth, and nuns do it with the holy spirit. I hate them. They are dumb. Ok, I do kind of like ballet dancers do it on barres, but I'm biased.

I found one worthwhile today:
UChicago students do it...theoretically.

Labels: amusing, u of c

Natalie: I dunno, when I think "cows in Africa" I just kind of think...wildebeest? I don't think you can milk those.

Rachel: No way. All wildebeest are good for are trampling your lion dad.

Labels: amusing, lion, wildebeest

...This blog (apparently) has a purpose.

Labels: nattily

You know what is pretty cool? It is pretty cool when they accidentally put an outskirt parking meter right in the middle of downtown, so a quarter buys you an hour instead of fifteen minutes, even though the sticker clearly says otherwise.

Labels: parking meters

And of course by LSD I am referring to Lake Shore Drive. It was closed this morning for some damn bike thing. Fucking environmentalists. Get a car! Took me like an hour to get to the loop on going up State Street.

So, the reason why I was going downtown is because my Shannababe is here with me. She came up for a psychology conference with her professor, but is really just staying with me and rocking out. She had (has) a huge desire to see Chicago in a kind of landmark to landmark way - a way I would never in a million years do on my own. I'm too lazy and cynical.

Today, despite my "it will probably be kinda dumb" protests, we went to the Maxwell Street Market. Holy. Shit. Earrings (crappy, but way pretty) for a dollar a pair, two dollar (way fake) pearl ring, $9 (a little steeper than I'd like, but I really needed them) for shit tons of fun socks, and best of all, bras - 4 for $10. I was not sure at first...I mean, bras? At a street market? Not totally cool. But they were clearly brand new, had perfectly intact tags, and we just kind of figured if we wash them first, how bad can it really be? Plus they are really awesome bras. I still feel kind of weird, but I think I'll get over it.

There was a table selling nothing but toilet paper. Just, unwrapped rolls of toilet paper. Now that is something I don't think I'd be able to get over.

There were two really spectacular booths though, which I just had to capture on film:

Scissors:


and tape:



Amazing.

Labels: cheap stuff, chicago, LSD, scissors, shanna, tape

Yay for GSB! Olivia! GSB! Olivia is staying in Chicago!!! My lover is staying in Chicago!!

Way to go University of Chicago Graduate School of Business, you accept those French Language and Literature majors!

Labels: chicago, olivia, u of c

Fuck you, kid whistling incessently on the A level of the library. You don't even have a tune going. Why would you do that?

Labels: annoyed, stupid people

I saw Iron Man today. It was...pretty good? I (obviously, I mean, come on) never read the comic books, so all I knew about it was a dude in a iron crazy suit and that song. You know...BUM, BUM, BUM-BUM-BUM, da-de-da-de-da BA-BA BUMBUM. You know.

So of course, I thought it would be shit. Then Gabe's facebook status was something like "Gabriel is...surprised that Iron Man didn't such as much as he expected." So, trusting Gabe's almighty judgment, Jon and I went to see it, since I had to be downtown for an appointment anyway.

Anyway. It didn't suck. It a lot didn't suck. I really enjoyed it. Robert Downey Jr. was actually a total badass, and a really good character. Plus, I'm totally a sucker for special effects. Whenever he grabbed the hologram and spun it around and actually put it on his arm (!!!), I was all OMGZ I WANTS IT.

I am legitimately excited for the new Batman. The first one was not a masterpiece, but it was entertaining, and last half was pure crazy special effects. From the previews, I think this one will be a little better.

You know what would make it AWESOME??
Alfred: But Batman, where are you going?!
Batman: ...I have to return some videotapes.

Sweet.

Labels: movies

HOUSE SEASON FINALE OMGZ

Really, though, that was amazing. That took serious guts from the writers. You just have to love a medical drama that actually has a legitimate storyline and fantastic acting. The show had to threaten the life of a main character at some point, I mean, it is a medical drama. SO tasteful though. I will admit, I teared up more than once.

Go watch it if you haven't yet.

Labels: tv

I can feel myself coming down. The past week I've been ecstatic for no reason. Now, suddenly, and just as unreasonably, I feel myself falling. What the fuck? Maybe my doctor is right, and I am bipolar. Or maybe I'm just delusional and making everything up. Either way, I feel like there is nothing in me right now. And I feel like I couldn't stay awake to save my life.

Are there normal people in the world? Are there people who aren't crazy? I doubt it. They are just better at hiding it.

Labels: whiny

There is a band upstairs. They are called "The Butts." We refer to them as "KILL 'EEMMMM, FUCKING KILL 'EMMMMM, KILL 'EM ALREADY, FUCKING KILL 'EM ALREADY" because those were the lyrics to their only song for the first two months of their existence. Since then, they have gotten a little better, but they have also gotten MUCH FUCKING LOUDER. They are nice guys, and Ilana's roommates, so it took us months before we broke down and called campus police. Unfortunately, campus police told us they had received so many complaints about it that we would have to call the Chicago police. We gave them a little longer, a week or so. But it's gone too far. We are waiting for the cops to show up and shut them the fuck up. I am just dying. Sorry, Butts.

Labels: hatred, pissy, the butts

Where else could you find this?

Thank you writing department of the University of Chicago. I just finished a ten-page paper in 4 and a half minutes.

Labels: amusing, chicago, school

Natalie: Maggie, it's very rude to tell someone to get things for you when you can get them yourself. You're a big girl and your drink is right over there on the table.

Maggie (age 3): I can't...(long pause)...I have to think.

Natalie: (mouth slightly ajar) gets drink from table

Labels: babysitting, children

Next time I:

• 10am - Go out to the quad (and coerce my boyfriend to come with) and set up an outdoor stage comprised of forty hundred-pound squares
• 11:35 - Arrive late to class (because I stayed to roll and tape the marley for this same outdoor performance which I had no involvement in whatsoever) completely unprepared because I spent my morning homework time helping out with the stage
  
• 12:30 - Get out of linguistics and watch the last ten minutes or so of the show, and then spend the next two and a half hours breaking down the entire stage, loading it into a car, transporting it back to Mandel, and unloading it, so that today my arms to not function and there is a bruise the size of Nevada on my leg
• 3:00 - Again, arrive to philosophy completely unprepared because I was breaking down the stage during my usual homework time for this class
• 4:30 - Go to the bookstore to buy thank you notes for UB
• 5:00 - Go to the EC meeting and write thank you notes until six even though you have already implied that I am lazy for not going to ballet class later (apparently my excuse of setting up/breaking down the stage being physically exerting was not enough)
• 6:00 - Feel bad about "being lazy" so I decide that if I'm not in class, I should at least be helping UBallet, so I go downstairs and start stripping tutus like you said you were going to so they can be washed
• 6:30 - Took a break from stripping tutus and bodices to unload boxes of UB shit from Rachel's car and bring them down to the studio
  
• 7:45 - Realize I really need to get home and do my work, so I put together eight romantic tutus to bring home with me, and tell Michael explicitly how the costume closet needs to be reloaded (Note: the only things I actually removed from the closet was one bag of classical tutus (four) and one extra classical that was not in a bag. Someone else has added more classicals and romantics to the pile, which I was happy to strip.)
• 8:00 - While walking down Kimbark looking absolutely ridiculous with a hanger of eight romantic tutus, get a call bitching me out for not cleaning up "my mess" and that you are "very disappointed with my behavior this week."
• 8:15 - Get home, ignore the phone call, spend the next hour with the romantic tutus in my bathtub with OxyClean and a tub that drains constantly instead of just holding water like a normal tub
• 9:15 - Finally sit down to do my work, when I hear bitching about me coming from the kitchen, try to ignore it, but come on, really? I try to defend myself.

...and you tell me to shut the fuck up, Ima slap a ho.

Labels: ballet, cleaning, pissy

I talked with my philosophy of dance (purely elective, not at all needed) professor after class today. She agreed (with no qualms) to let me take it pass/fail! Considering this class is completely unnecessary, I am very excited. I automatically have a 50% for turning in three precis and class participation, and I only need a 65% for a passing grade. Bam. Awesome.

Also, I have decided that I hate philosophy. Maybe even more than poetry. It's a close race.

I like dance though, so the class is entertaining. Writing papers for it sucks. Luckily, she cut out half the midterm and shortened the final paper to 6-8 pages.

Badass. Happy Natalie.

Labels: school

Today everyone in the ballet commune shared a really special experience. Michael (our wonderful token boy) got trapped in the bathroom. Seriously, very, really trapped.

It was Olivia's birthday party (happy birthday, love) so there about ten, twelve people here. Most people were headed to the MODA fashion show, including Michael, and they were running a little late. Michael went to use the restroom before they left. About five minutes later, Megan came stumbling from the hallway, announcing that he was locked in. Our bathroom door has issues, and people often get confused about how to get out, so we were not surprised. We were surprised when we told him the tricks of how to get out, and there was no way around the fact that he was completely trapped.

The situation: Door locked. Lock does not turn. Latch is stuck. There is no doorknob, at all. Hinges on inside of door. No sort of tools inside to get the door off the hinges. We have a screwdriver on the outside, but it is ineffective. We try the credit card trick. No luck. Window exists to climb out of. Window has wrought iron bars over the bottom half. Michael is a bigger guy. Michael tries to squeeze out the top half of the window. Fail.

The solution: Rachel comes to the rescue. Somehow, she understands that even though the screwdriver failed, there must be a way to turn the latch from the whole where the doorknob should be. In a stroke of pure brilliance, she grabs two chopsticks and shoves them in the hole. Success! Michael is free. Everyone ends up being very late to the fashion show because of the half hour effort to free him, and then the additional twenty minutes of laughing our asses off.

Good times.

Labels: amusing

T-Rex gets me every time.

qwantz.com - dinosaur comics - May 07 2008

Guys, a week ago I thought I would never say this, but today I can honestly say, CORSAIRE WILL BE AWESOME. I know pretty much everyone who reads this (except Jon, who is damn well coming to the show) lives in Florida and can't really come see me, but still, this is one of the coolest things I've ever done. I'm so incredibly proud of UB. And me. I am probably amazing.

I've spent the last three hours sewing new pointe shoes and coloring (with Sharpies, for realz) white flat shoes. I spent three hours earlier today both selling tickets and correcting all the mistakes that came with the music editing. I will spend an hour tomorrow tacking my tutu so it is flatter, because apparently the 5 or so hours I've already spent on it are not enough.

Seriously, this production is fabulous. I will post pictures soon to prove it.

If you happen to be a UC kid, or just generally near Chicago, you should come see us tomorrow (Saturday, so today I guess) at 8pm and/or Sunday at noon. It is only $5 and it is so so worth it.

Labels: ballet, corsaire

Whenever I see a word I don't know, I read it backwards to see if I understand it better. It usually doesn't help.

Doesn't everyone do that?

Labels: random